I do not want to be seen online
I haven’t posted on here in a long time. At first I felt kinda bad about it, because I had said that I would post on here so the friends I knew online could keep up with me, but I realized after some time:
I do not want an online presence.
I could talk about my generation and how we base our lives around social media to some degree, but for my life and from my standpoint, I just don’t want to be known online.
I don’t like getting notifications because it glues me to my screens, I don’t enjoy the feeling of knowing I am wasting my life away by sitting by at home and scrolling, I don’t like texting or commenting, I don’t even really like reading digitally.
This is a conundrum itself because yes, I will need to keep up with people that are not near me! But for whatever reason my brain is just not wired for texting. Even calling is kinda awkward, I don’t know. It’s like I become hyper aware of the sound of my breathing. And these are things in my own mind, yes, but it’s constant. The only time I text anyone is to make plans to see them. I hate having a conversation through the phone.
So I do apologize to the people who have not seen me in the past year because I have done my best to chronically offline. If you lived nearby, we would probably hang out.
I do feel like my social life is much better now, though. I’m much more involved in my community which is very fulfilling. I have some really good friends and have even rekindled some old friendships. More than all else, I’m content. Being online makes me bitter and envious. I am glad to be off.
Thanks for everything.